Better but not BETTER

So I finished chemo August 9th and started radiation in late August. Radiation is much easier to handle than chemo but it is everyday. So I can only work 5-6 hours on campus before my appt. Also, although I dont need as much sleep as I did with chemo, I still need more than normal, so my ability to work at night is limited. This leads to some problems.

I look "better". I am at work everyday. I have a near normal energy level. So people have started to add tasks to my list again. Because I was feeling better, I took on more of these tasks, but as the rubber starts to meet the road, it has become clear that *I am not all the way better*.

Last Monday we had our departmental retreat. Sunday night I found myself a basket case trying to figure out how I was going to accomplish 5 tasks that all had to be done and attend this retreat. I ended up calling in sick on Monday, sleeping in, and getting 1-2 of the tasks done, which made me feel much better.

I want to be better, to do my share in the department, and to contribute to the university, but the truth is that there are still limits to what I can do. I need to remember this.

Other than that, I am starting to get back into the swing of things. I've submitted 3 proposals in the last few months and a couple papers. So that's good, and my scans still show no recurrence so treatment is working.....