Dr. Mom, My Adventures as a Mommy-Scientist

Discussion of my journey from grad school to postdoc to tenure with two kids, a husband, (and a bit of breast cancer) in tow.

Friday, August 21, 2009

Why my husband is awesome

In a few weeks my husband and I will go on a second honeymoon. We are celebrating 10 years of marriage. I've been thinking a lot about those ten years and it has made me realize that I am 100% where I am today because of the support and advice of my husband. So here are all the reasons why my husband is awesome.

1. When working in industry after my BS. at a job that I hated told me to quit and do what I *really* wanted to do which was to be a professor.

2. Followed me 4 times (after BS, to PhD institution, to post-doc, and to faculty position) without complaint.

3. Babysat 2 year old daughter while I traveled virtually every week for 3 months while looking for faculty positions.

4. Took same daughter to water park every weekend for 3 months while I wrote my dissertation.

5. Kept me from quitting when thesis advisers or others implied that my work wasn't up to snuff.

6. Planned entire move to postdoc institution with family (5 week old son, 2 yo daughter, cat and me) including finding the house, enrolling kids in preschool, getting nanny etc.

7. Doing all that again 2 years later when I started my faculty position.

8. Giving me tremendously helpful advice about how to spend money when starting my lab (Basically risks are good, spend money to make money) that has paid off with 3 NSF grants in 3 years.

9. Forcing me to learn more about commercialization and think about patenting the results of my work.

10. Planning most of our vacations and taking on most major household projects.

As you can see he is truly an amazing man.


At 6:43 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

While I think that it is absolutely fabulous that you have such a wonderful and supportive partner, this makes me really feel like having it all means that you need to have a partner who is willing to take a backseat.

At 8:46 PM , Blogger PhD Mom said...

Feel like I really have to respond to anonymous. Yes, my husband has followed me numerous times, but I have also done much for him and his career. He completed a MLA in computer science while I was a postdoc at night. I was alone with 2 kids 3-4 nights per week. While I started my faculty career he did an MBA, again lots of nights alone with kids. He is now an entrepreneur trying to start a software business and I am his wingman at many events. Additionally, he has lots of evening meetings and travel and we are constantly balancing time away from each other with the success of our careers. He is definitely not a second fiddle. We both have "high-power" careers.

At 10:26 PM , Blogger ScienceGirl said...

Your husband sounds awesome, congrats on your 10 year anniversary!

At 12:58 PM , Blogger EcoGeoFemme said...

Happy anniversary! He does sound awesome!

I was going to ask if he also worked outside the home, and it sounds like he does. You two must be so organized!

At 4:25 PM , Blogger Candid Engineer said...

Sounds like a keeper! But you already know that. :) Congratulations.

At 9:58 PM , Blogger The PhD Mommy said...

Congrats! A supportive partner makes all the difference in the world. My husband was a financial consultant who quit his job (which he admittedly didn't like) to stay at home with our son for the first year while I finished my dissertation. He spent many nights alone with our son as I was in the lab writing til the wee morning hours for those last couple of months. But, like you, it's been a balancing act... prior to that he was in the Army for 8 years and I had to deal with 3 cross country moves in 8 years.

At 12:49 PM , Anonymous Lina Merchan said...

I am working on finishing my PhD in Physics, as my husband is, but I tend to be much more organized than him, so I decided to stop keeping score about who does what, and just manage the home and 2 kids, and work around his schedule. I am happier this way than trying to split all responsibilities and time 50-50.

At 10:52 AM , Blogger marry said...

Blogs are so informative where we get lots of information on any topic. Nice job keep it up!!

PhD Dissertation

At 1:39 PM , Blogger Allison said...

Congratulations! My husband and I also have two kids, four terminal degrees, and two "high-powered" careers. It surely isn't easy, but when I think about the alternatives, I'll take it. Now I just need to figure out what I'll do when I have to follow him to a town that has almost no professional opportunities for me next year!

At 4:58 AM , Blogger Love Kpop said...

I'm puzzled with lots of exercises. I was afraid I could not do the right time despite my hard work. I need a support person.


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